🚨 READ MAX FASHION ALERT: Read Max caps now available for purchase
Plus a discount for paying subscribers!
Read Max recently passed 20,000 subscribers, a genuinely astonishing number for what sometimes feels like an ongoing long-term prank I am playing on my own career. Setting aside any distancing irony, and defaulting to cliché, I am thrilled and honored that so many people have opted to receive these emails every month, and that some smaller (but still thrilling!) number of you actually consistently read them. This can be a challenging job--on an average week I produce around 4,000 words of copy--but it’s incredibly freeing (not to mention satisfying) to know that I’m writing to a specific audience of subscribers instead of a vague audience of “people Googling some of the words that are in my post’s headline.” So thank you to everyone, but especially to those of you who pay for this!
Read Max is supported entirely by a community of people who have the same specific type of brain problems that I do, and the disposable income to make them worse.
To celebrate this milestone, we are pleased to announce a new product in our storied lineup of Read Max merchandise.
Among the questions most commonly asked of this newsletter is how, exactly, these proud subscribers can best and most fashionably demonstrate their consumer satisfaction with and brand loyalty to the Read Max media empire and its various constituent parts.
Last year some lucky paying subscribers were able to snag one of the limited “Dad Thriller t-shirts” that quickly became a fashion sensation from Brooklyn to L.A. to Redding, Conn. But non-paying subscribers--or paying subscribers too late on the trigger--missed out on the clothing purchase of a lifetime. (You will never see Read Max merchandise for resale, because these items are considered family heirlooms by their owners.)
However! Do not despair! For those readers eager to tout their newsletter subscriptions, we have produced a new, no doubt hotly desired authentic Read Max merchandise item, available for sale at the link below!! The Read Max “EMAIL SUPPLY” dad cap, an exact reproduction of the cap worn by all Read Max email fulfillment specialists!! Best of all, while this cap is available to free and paying subscribers alike, paying subscribers get $5 off!!
The cap is an AS Colour “class cap” in “eucalyptus,” embroidered by the pros at Panther Printing in Paterson, N.J. It will be shipped (by me, so be patient) with a flat brim so customers from Southern California and other points west of the continental divide can wear it out of the bag; any purchasers from the Northeast and environs can fold the brim to the proper locally accepted arc. I am wearing one of these hats at present and can confirm that it sits on my head properly, offering a pleasant hat-like feeling.
**PLEASE NOTE: The hat shown in the images above contains a small but crucial misprint! The correct phone number for the Read Max offices is (843) 732-3629. The mistake has been corrected on future hats.
The hats are being offered for $22 (plus shipping) to everyone, free, paid, and non-subscriber alike--but paying subscribers can get them at cost ($17) with the code at the end of this email.
Click the link below to visit the Big Cartel store page. Email me if you have any questions (you can just respond to this newsletter, I’ll get it). Thank you again for your ongoing support.